It first crossed my mind about a year ago when I was pregnant with Cyril. I knew at that time that it wasn't going to happen right then, but I really began to contemplate when I would actually do it. That is, return to work outside the home.
I have been EXTREMELY blessed with my current job. I am able to work from home part time, have super bosses that are really flexible, etc. My only issue has been the lack of hands-on engineering that I do with my current job. And, engineering? Not exactly something that you can jump back into easily after being out of it for 10 years. So began my dilemma. Do I return to work? Do I go back to school? Do I just stay-at-home and begin a new career when I'm older? Being totally honest, I felt guilty considering going back to work because I don't HAVE to work and there are so many moms that do HAVE to work that would give anything to be a stay-at-home mom.
So, I do what I do with decisions like this--I sit on it and pray about it until I feel that I am being led in one specific direction. And when I felt led to put some feelers out for part time engineering work, I still felt torn in two. The war between what was best for my career and long term family goals (i.e. retirement for my husband) versus the guilt of leaving my children--it's tough deciding what is best for your family long term.
I drew up criteria and decided that, if I could find something that met it, I would go for it. This is what I knew:
1. I could only work part time (3 days a week).
2. I wanted to stay in Aerospace and/or Defense (in MI!!!)
I feel like there should have been more...
I had a good conversation with a friend of mine who basically told me not to stress about it--if it is meant to be, the doors will be open. If not, they won't. Long story short: a job totally fell into my lap. Thanks to a good word from a couple friends/former colleagues and a freshly updated resume (thanks to another friend), I basically had a job offer before I even went for an interview. Seriously, how often does that happen?
So, here I go. I'm starting a new job...away from home. I'm nervous and sad (about being away from my little ones), excited (about getting into some new work), and extremely grateful for a supportive husband who always encourages me to succeed.
**There is a lot of emotion and debate between women when the discussion of work versus home mom comes up. I read this blog entry over at Momastery and her feelings the work mom versus home mom emotions are spot on for me. Basically, every decision is a personal one and should be respected as that. No two families are the same.
