8 Years and Counting

About 12 years ago, in my "Big Red" house in Newport, KY, I started to do something that I had only read about and always quickly dismissed.  I'm not sure why, but I felt a pressing need to...start praying for my future husband.  I had no clue who it would be or why I, after years of being adamantly single, felt the need to do this.  And then, in November 2003, I met a man who would far exceed any expectations that I had for a future husband.  And, even though I was praying about this, I was completely blindsided.

See--I had actually known "of" my husband for years.  One of my good friends used to work FOR him and remained friends with him even after parting ways with the company.  I remember her describing him to me years prior to our meeting and me nodding, "sounds like an engineer."  (Nothing against engineers.  I AM an engineer...)  Oddly, I can remember this conversation clearly--riding in her jeep and her describing his blond hair while making a sweeping motion across her head. It wasn't anything--we were just talking.  So, when years later, she suggested that we would be good together I just blew her off and thought "She's really trying to figure a way to get me to the bar more often!"

But, then I unexpectedly met him at her birthday party and here we are 11 years after meeting, 8 years of marriage later and he is still the man that I always dreamed about and prayed about.  He is awesome--a loving husband, father, son, and friend.  Together we are navigating our way through this life.  We have no idea where it is leading us long term, but we have never known that!  We are enjoying the moments that we have and praying for many, many more moments to enjoy together.

Happy, Happy, Happy

Crazier But Even Happier!

Into the Light + Photo Dump

I am sitting outside right now and it is 70 degrees and sunny out.  It. Is. Perfect.  I have a soy latte in my hands, and a little free time since I finished my work for the day.  So, I thought that I would take the opportunity to do a photo dump of my fun little ones while writing about my journey through Lent.

All dressed up, ready for bed

Cecilia checking out her artwork from preschool on display at the AA library

My view of Lent has shifted over the years.  I can honestly say that I didn't fully understand it and, for some years, I wandered in and out of the church and didn't really observe Lent.  But it was a particular season of Lent that brought to my knees and drew me back into the Catholic church.  Since then, I haven't looked back.  Now, by the time that Lent rolls around every year, I am ready.  I need--I crave--this penitential, grace-filled time and this year was no exception.

Anna zooming in on the waterfall at the conservatory.

The main reason to eat raspberries--Raspberry Fingers!

Before Lent, I was feeling pretty miserable all around--physically, emotionally, spiritually.  I had gotten a cold, then a sinus infection, and finally a cold sore to ensure that I truly looked how I felt.  I looked in the mirror and could hear God saying, "Stop fighting it!  Come back to me and I will give you rest."  (Not physical rest, mind you.  I have three small children and a job.)

This boy loves books.  He just plops down in the middle of the library floor.

This is what happens when he doesn't get his way.  

What I have really tried to focus on this year is why we observe Lent.  No, it's not to "give things up" so that we can complain about it or to punish ourselves.  It's offering prayer and sacrifice in order that we can draw closer to God.  It's removing those obstacles that we put between God and ourselves, asking Him to make us clean so that we fully celebrate in the joy of Easter.

Seriously, how sweet is this?!?  Anna reading books with Dad.

Lent is a long seven week journey and, as life goes, mine has had peaks and valleys.  But, what God has slowly worked back into my heart is hope, and love, and grace.  I will always have to fight my cynical nature but, at least right now, I don't feel like the sick, cold-sored person that I was six weeks ago.  I know that I don't have to be--that God doesn't want me to be that person.  Which is a good place to be entering into Holy Week.  This is the week that we get to walk with Jesus from the time that he enters Jerusalem on Palm Sunday, through the Last Supper, His crucifixion, and His resurrection.  I can't wait.

And this is what I will be eating to celebrate.  :)  

Random Thoughts on Random Topics

Thoughts on kale:

From my husband:
"Kale is not even food.  It's what you eat when you are stranded on a desert island right before you resort to cannibalism"
and
"Kale is the equivalent to eating fish butthole."

I was rerunning these thoughts through my head while at the gym and nearly fell off the treadmill trying to stifle my laughter.  Kale is the new SUPER FOOD and everybody talks it up--put it in your kid's smoothies, they say.  They'll never notice the difference!  I never did this because, despite the fact that they couldn't taste it, they could SEE it.  (This all changed during a recent detox/cleanse that I did.)

Thoughts on Dr. Oz's 3 day Detox/Cleanse:

I did this after the new year because I had been doing some serious gorging on junk food for about 2 weeks.  I thought that it would jump start better eating habits and maybe lose a few of those holiday pounds.  Overall, it actually was pretty good though I did find my limit to be 2 days.  After two days of smoothies, I found it hard to pull the blender out the third day.  I also learned that my kids will drink ANY smoothie so long as it is mine.  They got enough fruit and vegetables during that three day period to last a good week--green smoothies and all.  I can't give a total weight loss because I refused to step on the scale before I started it.  So there.

Thoughts on buying Barbie:

For all the bad rap that Barbie gets, I found the holidays to be the true gauge on interest in the brand.  There was not a DreamHouse to be found ANY. WHERE.  Seriously--I searched every store in the lower Michigan, northern Ohio, and the Cincinnati area.  Nothing.  (I was not actually going to drive to get one if I DID find one, but I was curious.)
My girls ended up with a Barbie vacation home and vending machine and they LOVE it.  Honestly, it is like any other toy for them--a way to use their imagination.  I played with Barbies a lot growing up and I still somehow ended up being female engineer.  I believe it's more about empowering your kids every day and less about they toys that they play with.  My girls play with Barbies and they play with cars and trains.  They gravitate to what they want that day/hour/minute and I'm ok with that.  What I don't like, is EVERY time I see a Barbie randomly lying around, it looks like this:

At least they mold flesh colored underwear on her now...

Thoughts on winter:

It sucks.  My countdown to spring started before the first snowflake hit the ground.

Torn in Two -- Returning to Work Dilemma

It first crossed my mind about a year ago when I was pregnant with Cyril.  I knew at that time that it wasn't going to happen right then, but I really began to contemplate when I would actually do it.  That is, return to work outside the home.

I have been EXTREMELY blessed with my current job.  I am able to work from home part time, have super bosses that are really flexible, etc.  My only issue has been the lack of hands-on engineering that I do with my current job.  And, engineering?  Not exactly something that you can jump back into easily after being out of it  for 10 years.  So began my dilemma.  Do I return to work?  Do I go back to school?  Do I just stay-at-home and begin a new career when I'm older?  Being totally honest, I felt guilty considering going back to work because I don't HAVE to work and there are so many moms that do HAVE to work that would give anything to be a stay-at-home mom.

So, I do what I do with decisions like this--I sit on it and pray about it until I feel that I am being led in one specific direction.  And when I felt led to put some feelers out for part time engineering work, I still felt torn in two.  The war between what was best for my career and long term family goals (i.e. retirement for my husband) versus the guilt of leaving my children--it's tough deciding what is best for your family long term.

I drew up criteria and decided that, if I could find something that met it, I would go for it.  This is what I knew:

1.  I could only work part time (3 days a week).
2.  I wanted to stay in Aerospace and/or Defense (in MI!!!)

I feel like there should have been more...

I had a good conversation with a friend of mine who basically told me not to stress about it--if it is meant to be, the doors will be open.  If not, they won't.  Long story short:  a job totally fell into my lap.  Thanks to a good word from a couple friends/former colleagues and a freshly updated resume (thanks to another friend), I basically had a job offer before I even went for an interview.  Seriously, how often does that happen?

So, here I go.  I'm starting a new job...away from home.  I'm nervous and sad (about being away from my little ones), excited (about getting into some new work), and extremely grateful for a supportive husband who always encourages me to succeed.

**There is a lot of emotion and debate between women when the discussion of work versus home mom comes up.  I read this blog entry over at Momastery and her feelings the work mom versus home mom emotions are spot on for me.  Basically, every decision is a personal one and should be respected as that.  No two families are the same.  

What Happens When the Kids Find Photo Booth

I do this thing...I used to be a little embarrassed by it for some reason but I'm not anymore.  While I nurse Cyril before bed, I put the other two at the computer watching Netflix.  A mom has to survive and I decided that a half hour of Dora/Caillou/whatever is much better than being angry that they keep waking up their little brother.  I have "no touching" policy with the computer which they outright ignore.  For a 2 and almost-4-year-old, they have figured it out pretty well.  But, their latest trick is to open Photo Booth and snap a bunch of pictures.  So, by the time Cyril gets into bed, I get this:

Not too bad

They started getting goofy

Not sure what transpired that the pacifier was necessary

I just love Anna snuggling up to Cecilia in this one

Cecilia begins to take center stage...obviously the one in control

And now we just have Anna's eyes

 I was showing Joe this pictures when I noticed the "Effects" option in Photo Booth.  (Give me a break--the computer is relatively new and I don't spend a lot of time learning about it.)  So, I started clicking on the different effects and could not stop laughing.  I mean, what need is there for the "alien" effect other than a good laugh?

I'm almost crying from laughter

I think this was bug-eye or something.  I like how you can still see
the bags under my eyes from exhaustion.

Chipmunk--I'm still laughing at this one

So, apparently you have to be directly in front of the camera to get the effect which is why Cyril looks normal in most of the pictures.  I think that this adds to the humor because he is looking at us like there is something wrong with us.  Which....clearly, there is.

Meatless Friday - Best Lentil Soup Ever

This is how my kids make me feel most nights....

A friend of mine gave me this recipe and I've been hooked ever since.  She found the original recipe in a pregnancy cookbook so you know that it is chock full of healthy goodness.  She made a couple spice changes--mainly adding garam masala--that makes this hearty soup de-li-cious.  This is what is on our menu for tonight. 

Lentil Soup
1/2 cup brown rice (rinsed)
3 Tbsp canola oil
3 cloves garlic
1 cup diced carrots
1 cup diced celery
1 cup diced onion
1 1/2 cup dried lentils
1 tsp garam masala
2 tsp cumin
2 bay leaves
2 - 32 oz containers chicken or vegetable broth

Saute vegetables and garlic in oil until translucent.  I like to add the spices about halfway through so that they can roast a little bit.  Add lentils, rice, bay leaves, and broth.  Bring to a boil, lower heat, and simmer 1 hour or until lentils & rice is cooked.  Simple and easy, the way I like it.  :)

I've made this with both whole and split lentils and I prefer split lentils.  Either way, I soak them for some amount of time to speed up the cooking time.  Since my kids live on a steady diet of anything-that-I'm-NOT-cooking, I also tend to half the recipe so that I do not have a crazy amount of lentil soup to consume. 

Enjoy!

My Napless, Sugar-Free, Finger in Poop Day

Napless

For some reason our little guy has decided to pick up some of the worst sleeping habits yet.  In addition to getting up a lot at night, he has sworn off any nap that does not include me holding him.  What?!?  I keep hoping it's because he is teething and once that tooth breaks through, we can slowly move back to normal...hopefully...  So, for now, he enjoys just sitting on my lap while I work, trying to grab the mouse as I click away.

Hi, I'm Cyril and I refuse to nap.

But I am cute!

Sugar-Free

I gave up sugar for Lent.*  It's already been the longest Lent ever and it's only been a week.  Turns out that it's not really sugar that I crave--it's food.  I'm not sure when I became an emotional eater.  Plus, I love snacking at night. I can't help but feel like I deserve an award after getting all three kids in bed...but I am really trying to break it this Lent.   

Finger in Poop

Need I say more?  I'm still traumatized by this.  (Yes, I have three kids and have gotten it on me before, but this experience was exceptionally gross.)  You would think that this experience alone would give me that extra motivation to just potty train Anna already.  She can totally do it--I'm just lacking the energy right now.  And I'm a little nervous about where else poop may end up...

*Before Lent, I try to discern what has a greater hold over me than it should.  Not surprisingly, it is typically some type of food--candy, desserts, peanut butter are all really common.